I'm sorry I left all of you hanging for a couple days. As you can imagine, it was quite a blow to hear my kids are being blatantly lied to (this is not the first time). However, I have a plan, and I will stick to it. I know in my heart and mind that they know the real truth.
The fact of the matter is that they shouldn't even know what child support is, or court, or any of this stuff...and I'm not the one who keeps telling them all about it.
But, I digress...
When we left off, I showed you a handwritten document that my Ex signed, stating she was leaving me, our home, and our children. Not only that, but she cleaned out both the business and personal bank accounts, taking all the money we had, leaving me with my 5 kids to care for....with no money.
What did I do?
Well, my first action was to take my children home and to have the locks changed. Yes, that very day. I did not want her getting back in, especially after she signed that paper without batting an eye. I mean, this wasn't the first time she cheated on me, but for me, it would be the last time. I was done.
It wasn't until a couple days later I realized that all the money was gone. I started to get NSF mail from my bank. That means Non Sufficient Funds. I was paying bills but didn't realize that both accounts were overdrawn. Every time the bank tried to pay a bill and I didn't have funds to pay for it they would charge me $35.00. That was happening several times a day! So my next visit was the bank. Of course, our accounts were joint, so they couldn't help me, but they did confirm she cleaned out BOTH accounts. I explained what was going on and the bank cleared the fees. Hundreds of dollars of fees! I was thinking what the heck do I do with no money and 5 kids?
Panic? Yeah. Five kids to care for and no money? Shut the front door!
And how about this....She went to the bank and cleaned out the accounts WITH the kids in the car! THEY told me they went to the bank with mommy. I mean, the money aside, how do you think my kids felt having their mom leave like that?
She went to the bank WITH them and took all the money. She then drove to my shop WITH them and dropped them off and LEFT.
My kids wanted to know where mommy went and when she was coming back. What do you say to 5 children who are looking for their mother...and their mother isn't coming back?
Do you say she doesn't love you? Of course not.
Do you say she is never coming back? Well, no, because I didn't even know if she was coming back.
She just left. Left me, left them, left everything, with no explanation...for another man she hardly even knew.
So, what did I tell my kids? I think I ended up telling them that mommy is taking a trip and will hopefully come back soon.
What else was I supposed to say without breaking their spirits? I mean, it's not as if this was easy on me either...so having my 5 kids go through this was horrific.
The first person I contacted was, believe it or not, my Ex's mother. I told her what happened, and guess what she did? She gave me money. LOTS of money.
Now, mind you, I talked to my Ex's mother face-to-face, and the entire time, she looked like a deer caught in headlights. She was completely shocked by what was going on. Her daughter left her husband and children for another man....I bet that wasn't in the cards!
She helped me by giving me money. And with that money, I hired a lawyer. Now, don't look at me like that! I had to protect myself and my children. That was first and foremost in my mind. I had no idea if she was on drugs, or whatever...and I had NO IDEA who this guy was that she was having the affair with. Protection was the No. 1 thing on my agenda.
The next step was getting in touch with my Ex and finding out what the heck was going on. My Ex's cousin intervened as a mediator and worked out a parenting agreement, which I will show you now.
This was done over the phone because my Ex would not say where she was living. My Ex's cousin and I were trying to follow her tracks, and all the sudden received a text from my Ex saying "stop trying to find me". So, apparently, we were close.
So, over the phone it was. And this is the result:
Handwritten Parenting Agreement
Again, she admits she abandoned the kids and gives me custody. This will be in a court document later, every bit of it. I gained temporary custody of my children.
From here, it will all be official. You will see actual court documents that corroborate what I'm telling you now. If you think this is as bad as it gets, hold on to your hats, because you ain't seen nothin' yet!!
Lessons learned from this: Don't hesitate to get a lawyer. Change the locks! Don't ignore the signs that something is WAY OFF with your spouse, don't let one person on a joint account be able to draw all the money out of said account without approval from the other person listed on the account.
Next, you are going to read how I got custody of my children and thought all was well...only to be slapped with a restraining order from out of nowhere.
Stay tuned.....
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