So, at this point in time, I had last spoken to my oldest child on February 12, 2009. Because I was having such a difficult time getting my Ex to return my calls so that I could speak to my other children, and because of the van found in the condition it was on the side of the road, I just knew that something very strange was going on. On top of that, I had received a message regarding my oldest child not being in school for several days and had received a letter from the DA's office regarding truancy charges that were being pursued.
So, on February 13, 2009, I called the elementary school to see if my children were in school that day. I was told that they were not. I was also told that my oldest child had been withdrawn from that school and that the school had received a request from the private Christian school for his transcripts so that he could be enrolled there.
I already posted the attendance records in a previous post that shows the days that my children missed from school, but it took some time to put all the pieces together. After going to the Christian school and speaking with them, I found out that my oldest child had been enrolled there since February 4, 2009 (I had absolutely no knowledge that this had happened).
My other children were still enrolled at the public elementary school, but again, had not been in school recently; therefore, my oldest child was the only child that anyone could account for in the last week, and then he disappeared as well.
During this time, I was sending text messages to my Ex to try and get her to drop off the title to the van that I was awarded in court. Getting this title was not extremely urgent to me, but I figured that at least I would know that she was still in the area if I could get her to drop it off. My thinking was that if she was still in the area, chances were that my kids were also somewhere nearby.
At first, she told me that she would drop the title off, but when I put a time limit on it, she refused and got hostile with me. I set it up so she could drop it off at a local business and wouldn't even have to see me, but I told her it had to be by a certain time because they close at that time. She accused me of threatening her and ultimately did not drop off the title.
My next move was to call a mutual friend of ours. I asked him to go to my Ex's house (he and his wife were still in close contact with my Ex) and see if she and my children were home and/or if they were still living there. Instead of just dropping by, he called her. She told him that they were not living at the "red house" any longer and hadn't been for over a week because she was afraid to stay there. She said that they were all at a McDonald's at the time and that the kids were fine.
I tried again to call my Ex so that I could speak to my kids and had to leave a voicemail. She finally texted me back and said "What do you want?" She then claimed that she had no minutes on her phone but could send text messages, which didn't make any sense at all. I texted her back and said "Call from your mom's then. I want to talk to my kids please. Thanks."
She texted back and said, "Later. I'm busy now. You can text them now." Well, I was not about to text my children. How would I even know who I was talking to? I told her, "No. I am not texting my kids. Who knows who I am texting? I want to speak to them right now. Go to your mom's and call me like you have before. Thanks."
She again stated that she was busy and would have them call later. I said, "Ok. Give me a time that you will be calling so I know when to expect their call. Thanks." She responded, "I don't know, just have your phone. Again, I'm busy."
I then texted and asked her why it was so difficult for her to give me a time when she would call and that I hadn't talked to them in 1.5 weeks (excluding my oldest). She never responded to me and I never got a phone call.
Little did I know that they weren't even in the state any longer...they were on the road, traveling far, far away.
The next day, I again texted my Ex and said that I wanted to speak to the kids. She never responded.
Since my worry was beginning to reach maximum heights, I began thinking of who I could call to find out where my kids actually were. I knew at that point that my Ex was lying to me. I couldn't prove anything yet,aside from the information I received that they were not living at the "red house" any longer, but my gut was letting me know that something was very wrong and there was major deception going on.
On Saturday, February 14, 2009, after unsuccessfully trying to reach my children again, my next call was to my Ex's grandmother. She normally keeps in close contact with my Ex's mother, and because I had had no success in reaching my Ex's mother yet, I decided to give her a call. I recorded the conversation, just like every conversation, and really did not get much information from her except the continuing feeling that I was being lied to.
She told me that she had no idea what was going on with my Ex or where the children were or if they were even ok.
My next call was to my Ex's mother. I had tried to call her before, but she never returned my calls. I left a message this time stating, "It's 8:30 on Saturday. I need to know if you know where (Ex's name) and the kids are. I haven't talked to them in 2 weeks or seen them. I don't even know if they are alive right now. Could you please give me a call before I have to get the police involved in this? Please give me a call." I left my phone number (even though she had it already) and said thanks.
At 9:22 p.m. that same night, my Ex's mother called me back. Again, I recorded the conversation. I asked her if she knew where my Ex and the kids were. She said she didn't know. She said she had seen my Ex at the school (Christian school) on Thursday afternoon. I asked her if my Ex and the children were still living at the "red house". She responded that she didn't know what I meant.
Now, let me pause for a moment here and let the obvious sink in. "Didn't know what I meant?!?" The "red house" is a house that is located on my Ex's parent's property. It has always been referred to as "the red house". She knew exactly what I meant, but you see, my Ex's mother won't lie...so she did the only thing she could do and dodged the question.
I asked her again and she then said that all of my Ex's stuff was still there. I asked her if my Ex and the kids were still staying there at night. She said that she knew that my Ex and the kids did not stay there over the weekend (I'm not sure what weekend she was referring to since this conversation took place on a Saturday).
She then told me that she would let my Ex know that I called the next time she spoke with her. I know that she was wanting to end the conversation at that point, but I was not finished yet. I asked her if my Ex's boyfriend (the one she left me for) was still staying at the "red house" with my Ex and my kids. She said that he wasn't. She then said that she knew he had been staying down there but that he was not there any longer. She also admitted that she knew exactly who this guy was.
I then asked her if she knew if my kids were okay because I had not seen them or talked to them in 2 weeks and I was very worried about them. This is when the conversation took a turn....
She told me that it was not true that I hadn't talked to them in 2 weeks. So, for accuracy, I corrected myself and said, "Okay, a week and a half, but will be 2 weeks on this upcoming Wednesday." I told her that my Ex was alienating my children from me. I asked her if she was aware of that, and she said that she wasn't. I again repeated that I hadn't seen or spoken to them in a week and a half and that for all I knew they were dead. She told me then that she had seen my Ex and the kids on Thursday evening.
I asked her if she knew what was going on with my Ex and the kids, and she told me that she did not understand what I was asking. I then told her that my Ex had been acting very strange, giving the impression that something was going on. She then stated that she didn't know what I meant and accused me of threatening her regarding calling the police.
She then told me to hold on a minute, and then hung up on me.
The next day, Sunday, I again tried to call my Ex so that I could talk to my kids. I got a message that her voice mailbox was full, so I couldn't even leave a message. I tried to text, but, well that didn't do any good either.
Monday was more of the same. Full mailbox, no answers to text messages.
On Tuesday, February 17, 2009, we had a court hearing. My Ex did not show up. No one knew where she was, including her lawyer. They had tried to call her and she would not answer the phone, and again, her voice mailbox was full.
It was at that point, when she didn't show up for court, that I decided it really was time to get the police involved. After court that day, my friend and I went to the Sheriff's Department to attempt to file missing person's reports for my Ex and all of my children. After all, the last time anyone claims to have seen them was the prior Thursday, 5 days earlier. On top of that, I had attendance records showing that they had not been in school for even longer than that.
We went to the Sheriff and took photos of the kids and descriptions. We took text messages and my recordings of phone calls along with the attendance records from the schools. I talked to them at length and they honestly seemed very concerned about my kids. They said that they were going to investigate thoroughly. They told me that they were going to go and interview my Ex's mother and see if she had any information.
They ended up going to my Ex's mother's workplace to talk to her. The police told me that she did not seem concerned at all even though the none of the children had been in school since February 4th. She said that she didn't know where they were but that she had spoken to my Ex the previous Saturday.
They then told me that because my Ex had primary physical custody of the kids, this was a civil matter and I would have to talk to my lawyer and go to court. They said they would go no further to investigate.
Um...let me get this straight. FIVE children and their mother pretty much vanish off the face of the earth and the police will do NOTHING?? Nice, huh?
I called the schools that day and found out, again, that no one was in school. I tried to call my Ex, and this time the phone was disconnected completely.
So, it's now February 18, 2009, and I receive a call from the detective at the Sheriff's Department telling me that my Ex had called them and assured them that the children were okay. She would not say where they were. Again the children were not in school that day, and the detective would not give me anymore information.
I was on my own. I went to my lawyer and wanted to file for temporary emergency custody of my children and also file charges for parental kidnapping. My lawyer's response? "Well, she will surface eventually and we will get her then."
If I have any advice to offer at all regarding this entry, it is this:
If your attorney will not act on your behalf, ESPECIALLY when the situation is as dire as mine was, find another attorney. Don't wait, don't hesitate. Fire your lawyer and go to another and another until you find one who will help you. Hindsight is always 20/20, so I'm hoping to save someone out there from having to look back, saying "if only I had...."
Next time you read, I will finally find out where they all are, through crazy circumstances. Now that I think of it, has anything been normal yet?
Thanks for reading. See you on the flip side.
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